What’s Happiness got to do with it ... women, life and pleasure? Try the Tantric Approach!!!

The illusiveness of happiness! What a rat race to find it and then if you were lucky to get it how to keep it. Marcus Buckingham’s research and findings in HuffPost based on his paper "The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness" inspired me to reflect on my own progression in life to happiness and on the happiness of the hundreds of women I have worked with over the past 10 years as an intimacy and relationship coach.

What’s happiness anyway? The older I have grown the happier I have become. And that does not just have to do with that I now own a business, making a difference in the lives of women and men, and being in the most inspiring relationship with my Beloved and business partner. That’s rather a result of something else.

After all happiness is a state of being! And how did I arrive at that state of being? For me this occurred through two major life experiences that awoke me to that state: One experience had to do with “accepting “what is” at the present moment and declaring that I choose to be happy which I learned through Buddhist meditation at Thich Nhat Hanh’s Plum Village. That philosophy is totally in line with what Buckingham identifies in his findings: “The women who could answer positively to the questions [regarding happiness] …, simply decided that they were going to be happy. They made that choice.”

The other experience had to do with “weaving” or Tantra. O.K. – what did I learn about weaving? It was about reintegrating my feminine with my masculine or the yin with the yang that is frequently out of balance for women living in this time and age. Most of us have learned to develop our masculine side that is required to compete and make it in the world. Great capacity to have! However, if my feminine got dwarfed because of the dominant orientation towards achieving in the worldly dimension I am just not whole any longer.

Here is what Tantra-Kundalini.com says about the feminine and masculine: ”According to the philosophy of Tantra, the entire universe is a manifestation of pure consciousness. In manifesting the universe, this pure consciousness seems to become divided into two poles or aspects, neither of which can exist without the other.

One aspect, Shiva, is masculine, retains a static quality and remains identified with unmanifested consciousness. Shiva has the power to be but not the power to become or change. The other aspect, Shakti, is feminine, dynamic, energetic and creative. Shakti is the Great Mother of the universe, for it is from her that all form is born.

According to Tantra, the human being is a miniature universe. All that is found in the cosmos can be found within each individual, and the same principles that apply to the universe apply in the case of the individual being.”

The aspects of feminine and masculine show up in women just as they do in men. However, they are not merely to be considered as gender qualifications. To illuminate the principles further take a look at this chart and locate yourself on the right or left in various areas of your life: family, intimate relationship, work and career, body, hobbies, etc:

Masculine / Feminine
Creative Focus / Creative flow
Purposeful presence / Open and connected
Desire for truth / Desire for sourcing and sustaining
Oriented towards vision and goals / Oriented towards love and care
In one’s mind and focused / In one’s emotions & flow
Emotion of compassion / Emotion of trust & gratitude
Looking at life from the outside / Looking at things from within
Fear of failure in life / Fear of rejection & loss of love
Work before intimacy / Intimacy before work
Doing Being / Giving Receiving

Reintegrating the feminine with the masculine, the spiritual with the sensuous, the body with the soul, the giving with the receiving wholeness shows up. Experiencing wholeness is the source of feeling pleasure, joy and yes, HAPPINESS!!! It’s up to each woman to return to that wholeness. The tantric practice provides a guide to that wholeness as shown by transformative shifts in many women who have worked with me here at TantraNova.

Looking forward to your comments and thoughts abut this topic of happiness! Elsbeth

Sex Magic - Fuel your Dreams into Reality

Sex Magic! What is it? How does it work? Actually, does it really work? It's been talked about and practiced in some places on the globe for millennia. Yet what relevance and implications does it have for us today?

I came across sex magic in the context of my tantric studies and teacher training a number of years ago. That is when I learned about the power of sexual energy as creative force and how to cultivate and channel that energy. I learned to marry my orgasmic energy with an intention to manifest what I wanted to bring into reality.

The business of creating our reality has been of course brought into the spot light via the popularization of the "Law of Attraction" through the movie "The Secret" as promoted by modern success leaders such as Jack Canfield, Abraham Hicks, Joe Vitale, and many others. While these leaders teach about how to direct desire and raise emotional vibration in order to achieve one's goal, they don't speak, however, "to the power of sexual desire used to fuel to have our wildest dreams come true. This is the secret beyond the secret: sex magic", as my colleagues and friends, Baba Dez Nichols and Kamala Devi, wrote in their book "Sexual Healing: The Shaman Method of Sex Magic."

So let's look more deeply at what's meant by sex magic. Baba Dez' and Kamala's take on it is that "... sex magic is a spiritual practice that uses sexual desire to manifest tangible effect in the physical world. One of the most powerful experiences that we have as human beings is orgasmic energy, and if we can pair it with intent, then we can direct the most powerful manifesting force available on earth."

Let's listen to another master in the field of sex magic - she wrote a whole book on it, called "The Art of Sexual Magic". The author of course is Margo Anand, one of the pioneers of the modern Tantra movement in the West. She writes: "... basic principles of sexual magic [are]: generating sexual energy as a fuel, or power, for making magic and realizing your personal goals. ..... by planting the seeds of your deepest desires in states of heightened orgasm you create the alchemy through which they become reality....."

In this post I'd like to offer a practical approach to Sex Magic so you at home can explore via solo or partner practice as you see fit. The steps I am suggesting here for your sex magic ritual apply to both, doing the practice by yourself or with your partner.

Here we go:

1. Create a space where you are undisturbed for an hour. This is a time is for you to cherish yourself and your partner. Make this a sacred ritual: set the room up with candles and flowers; have your favorite music playing supporting a serene and meditative space.

2. Come into conscious breathing in a sitting position. The breath allows energy to flow effortlessly throughout your body and between partners. The breath assists in channeling your sexual energy in the sex magic ritual. (To learn more about conscious breathing you may want to check out TantraNova's Foundational Practices CD). If you are with your partner breathe together in a synchronized way.

3. Set an intention! Reflect on what you'd like to create in your life, work, family, intimate relationship with yourself or with your partner. Give yourself time to become clear. Listen to each other intentions if you are sharing this experience with your partner. Acknowledge any concern, fears or discomfort you may experience. By acknowledging what's there for you often lessens the charge. This allows for a sense of being heard and feeling safe.

4. To raise your energy lie down and come back to conscious breathing. Breathe your energy from your sexual center up to your crown center on the inhalation and back down and out again on the exhalation. Touch yourself or each other to arouse your senses and energy. Keep listening to yourself and to each other. Keep breathing while circulating your energy within yourself as well as with your partner.

5. Let the orgasmic energy flow without climaxing. While riding the wave of orgasmic flow and joy call in your intention of what you'd like to create in your life. Imbue your intention with your orgasmic life force energy. Stay in that flow as long as you like and can. The ritual is particularly powerful if you don't climax. This way the energy gets channeled into your creation.

6. Slow down! Come to stillness! Keep breathing and circulating within or with your partner.

7. Upon completion acknowledge to yourself or share with your partner how you feel and what's shown up for you.

To learn more about conscious breathing and circulating sexual energy you may want to check out TantraNova's Foundational Practice CD and The Discovery of Sexual-Spiritual Connection DVD

Any comments, thoughts, questions? Scroll down and use the Comment section to connect. We'd love to engage with you! Dr. Elsbeth Meuth or Freddy Zental at TantraNova.com

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Secrets to Lasting Intimacy: Ancient Tantric Wisdom transforms Modern Love

Taoism, Hinduism, Buddhism, North American Quodoshka, and others, hold secrets to creating fulfilling love and intimacy that are not known to the Western world. One of these ancient traditions is Tantra which was born over 5000 years ago in East India and practiced by people that called themselves tantriks or tantrikas. You might wonder “What is it and how does it work?”

Here is a taste of what it’s all about: In the Western world we look at our bodies, relationships and life in a way that is often compartmentalized. For example, we think of sexuality being separate from spirituality – as manifested in our bodies and our practices. In Tantra a possibility is offered that teaches how to integrate one’s sexual with one’s spiritual energies. This allows for a divine experience with oneself and ultimately with a partner. Rediscovering our innate energies that are sexual-spiritual in nature we then are able to express ourselves more fully – free from constraints and habitual patterns, e.g., shame, guilt, fear, suppression or obsession. And this in turn allows us to experience our full potential of pleasure and creativity.

In learning about Tantra many years ago I experienced a big opening namely the connection and integration of my pleasure self with my divine being. This rediscovery is one of the fundamental breakthroughs Tantra offers and now I witness these breakthroughs in our students at the TantraNova Institute all the time.

How does it happen? In the TantraNova approach we use the breath, energy awareness, meditation and healing practices with disciplines based in human development, generative language and creative self discovery. The breath is the key to activate and move energy including aroused energy. Through specific breathing exercises you can learn to connect the lower energy centers (related to feeling centered and save as well as pleasure and joy) with the higher energy centers (related to feeling love and spiritual connection). To get a first hand experience of “energetic flow” try this solo practice:

Sit in a comfortable position

- Take in a deep breath and feel your belly rising on the inhalation and falling on the exhalation.

- Put your right hand on your belly below your navel (this is your creative energy center), and your left hand in the middle of your chest (this is your heart or love energy center).

- Take in a deep breath, expanding your belly into your right hand and then breathe up into your chest into your left hand.

- On the inhalation feel your energetic breath moving from your right hand on the “Creation Center” up into your left hand on the “Heart Center”

- On the exhalation visualize sending the energetic breath from your “Heart Center”, the left hand, down into your “Creation Center”, the right hand.

- Continue in this breathing pattern for eight breaths

- Slowly take your hands off and let them rest in your lap.

- Stay with your breath and the connection between your Creation and Heart centers. Notice how you feel right now.

- Come back by opening your eyes.

Creating intimacy has all to do with being aware of where desire originates from. Tantric tradition holds that men and women approach sex and intimate relationships in fundamentally different ways. For men, sexual energy originates in the sexual center, while for women it originates in the heart. The result is a big disconnect: He’s feeling it here, she is feeling it there, and eventually no one’s feeling it anywhere. Tantra comes to the rescue by helping you get on the same wavelength.

Therefore we teach men to channel and master their sexual energy by integrating their sexual with their heart energy. Thus they become present and available to more deeply connecting with themselves and their partner. Women learn how to open their heart so their sensual intimate self can receive and trust.

We are all full of sexual energy – it’s our life force energy, also called chi in the Tao tradition and Kundalini in the tantric tradition. It’s our most profound life source – part of what created us, and the key to helping us achieve our dreams, including better relationships. Unfortunately, most of us have no idea what to do with that energy. The tantric practice allows us to learn how to use our sexual creative energy as a doorway to our most intimate spiritual, emotional and physical selves.

Update from Dr E

It’s been a while that we communicated on our TantraNova blog. We have been busy with teaching workshops in Orange County and San Diego, with completing our 6-month Level I Certification program with a phenomenal group of students, with lots of workshops here in Chicago and last not least with Freddy Z’s one-man show that enjoyed a packed house at the Institute last night.

While TantraNova is growing, I (Elsbeth) need to grow as well: More projects, more people and more tasks to coordinate and manage. I have been getting a lot of assistants from Kristin who has been working with us in the administration area of the business for the last year. Her support has been freeing me up to focus more on business development and marketing.

I am thrilled about our new offering of practice class series – both available at the Institute as well as a Tele-class. Co-leading the classes allows me the enjoyment of weekly practicing in community. It’s fabulous – for 1.0 or 1.5 hours I get the opportunity along with the students to come to stillness, get more connected with myself and others in the class, and feel my energy and aliveness running through me.

And then we have all these new ideas that are on the drawing board for 2009:

o Freddy Z is in the process of developing his TantraNova Theater Workshop that will be available to the public in October and then he’ll take it around the country to different cities along with his moving and breath-taking TantraNova Man: An Experiential Show.

o Very soon we’ll let you know about our NEW magnificent TantraNova vacation retreat in Costa Rica that is being planned for early March 2009.

o Our Advanced & Certification program starting mid March of 2009 will have a new structure conducive to students from all across the USA. Check it out at TantraNova Certification Program.

You probably can tell that I live and breathe TantraNova. Bringing forth the wholeness and well-being of sexual-spiritual connection within and another is most important to me. I am so fortunate to have this wonderful man Freddy Z by my side who creates with me, who supports and encourages me and who resonates with me in my/our life intentions and dreams.

I am thrilled that we together can support you and others in their journey to greater wholeness and intimate well-being in themselves and their relationships.

Thanks for traveling the road with us, Elsbeth

Freddy Zental's Breakthrough Performance

Zental here. About a month ago Elsbeth and I had the honor of being presenters at the Eighth Annual Tantra Practitioners Conference in Sedona, Arizona. We opened the conference with a presentation on how we came to create TantraNova, why we do what we do and with sharing video clips from the Showtime Special “Sexual Healing” which we were a part of in 2006. The audience was so appreciative and loved what they saw happening for the couples on the show. If you haven’t seen the clips yet please go TantraNova on "SHOWTIME". It’s a wonderful illustration of what shows up when we drop into our hearts and connect with each other while we bring consciousness and focus to our sexual energy and being.

For the close of the conference I had the privilege of performing TantraNova Man: An Experiential Show , my one-man show. I experienced a huge breakthrough in my performance: This was the first time that I did the show in front of an audience of 200 people on a hi-tech professional stage and the first time traveling with the show outside of Chicago. Even if I say so myself … I felt it was the best performance I had ever given. My singing, presence, dramatic expression and moment–to- moment improv were at an all time high! I reached a whole new level … receiving a standing ovation. I am thrilled and excited!

So … perhaps I will be in your town soon doing the TantraNova Man show. Or if you are planning a visit to Chicago please join us on July 19^th for my next show there. 

Until then … Love and Light, 

Zental

For further information and questions email us at tantranova@tantranova.com or go to www.TantraNova.com

Stay in the Practice - Connect with Others

Here is something brand new at TantraNova. It’s about a regular TantraNova Yoga class for our students. Some of you had inquired about this kind of ongoing practice class that is different from our monthly seminars, intro workshops or certification programs. 

Just as Freddy Zental and I have our regular workout practices – like going to yoga class, doing resistance training or cardio, taking walks by the lake or meditating – we thought of how to create such a regular practice class for our students. 

Voila! That inspired us to create our new bi-monthly practice class here at the TantraNova Institute. The class is designed to get grounded in and stay with the foundational TantraNova practices that assist you in energy awareness and flow, conscious breathing and pelvic floor strengthening, all which are so essential in integrating our spiritual, emotional and sexual being. Of course, there will be exercises and conversations that guide you in how to bring all of that into your daily life and relationship(s).

Bi-Weekly TantraNova Yoga Practice Classes at the Institute:

The class will meet every other week at the TantraNova Institute in Chicago - starting in May. To attend the class you will need to have completed one of our workshops or private programs. The 2-hour intro workshop or an introductory private session suffices to qualify!!!

Bi-Weekly TantraNova Yoga Practice Tele-Classes:

Starting in the summer we will offer bi-weekly TantraNova practice Tele-classes. With access to a phone you will be able to participate in these classes from wherever you may be in the country or the world.

Look for more details on these new class offerings in your email box in coming days!

For further information and questions email us at tantranova@tantranova.com or go to www.TantraNova.com

Keep your Yoni Alive and Well!

This blog is dedicated to women – and the men who care about them!
 

It’s Dr E here. I’d like to introduce you to the “Yoni Egg” today. Yoni is a Sanscrit word that means “Sacred Space” and stands for a woman’s sexual center. The sound of “Sacred Space” expresses much more the sense of honoring and cherishing than our clinical term vagina does.

Building on the “Want more joy, pleasure and peace in your life and relationships?” blog from last week we want to continue emphasizing the relevance of having strong pelvic floor muscles. And here is where the Yoni Egg comes in: It allows you to enliven and keep your Yoni alive. It assists in developing and maintaining a strong, vital PC Muscle, which is paramount to a healthy pelvic floor. 

By strengthening your PC Muscle with your Yoni Egg inserted while you use the breath to move the energy through your body (see blog from 4/1/08 for guided practice) you will: 

1. Feel more grounded and centered in yourself

2. Be more in tune with your sensuous capacity

3. Massage your Yoni from the inside

4. Increase your flow of sexual hormones

5. Develop stronger orgasms

6. Heighten the responsiveness of your G-Spot

7. Maintain healthy reproductive organs

8. Prevent incontinence in later years

9. Experience pleasant aliveness in your feminine center

You already can tell that training your Yoni muscle with the aid of the Egg creates a whole new octave of a sense of groundedness in your feminine being, of expanded sensual experience and ultimately sexual ecstasy with sensations that are deliciously pleasurable. 

The Yoni Egg is made from rose quartz - a polished gemstone. It comes in a sari pouch in various colors with instructions. You insert the Egg covered with some lube to make the passage smooth. Once the Egg is inside your Yoni it’s being held in by the vaginal sphincter muscle. The Egg cannot disappear in your womb – the tiny opening of the cervix won’t allow for that. So you can rest assured that the Egg stays well enveloped in your Yoni space. You can leave it inserted for an hour or a whole day – as I do at times – depending on your comfort. Keep squeezing and releasing every so often. Once you want to take the Egg out just press with your pelvic floor muscle like you do during a bowel movement. It’ll flop out – catch it in your hand.

For further information and questions email us at tantranova@tantranova.com. To purchase a Yoni Egg call 773-525-5006. www.TantraNova.com

For TantraNova Women’s programs go to Women's Seminar & Class Series