For centuries masculine energy has been dominating the planet as feminine energy has been suppressed. Modern men are heralded for their sexual prowess and conquests from an early age; when a teenage boy experiences sex for the first time, he may tell his father, who will reaffirm the boy’s virility by congratulating him and giving him condoms—a tacit approval of what he’s done and an implication that the boy is on his path to manhood.
On the other hand, when a teenage girl has sex for the first time, often she will keep it secret out of shame or embarrassment. She most likely will not go to her mother for fear of disapproval and being considered impure or no longer marriage material. In some parts of the world, she may be called a whore, outcast from her family or community, or even stoned to death.
Masculine and feminine energy—like testosterone and estrogen—exists in all people, regardless of gender, and the balance between the two is what leads to harmony amongst each other and throughout the world.
A shift of consciousness is happening now as the feminine is rising. Women are re-connecting with their feminine essence while having developed their masculine capacities over the past 50 years since the onset of the women’s movement.
The call for the 21st century male is to come into balance of his masculine or yang side with his feminine or yin side. Masculine essence has many gifts to offer, such as clarity and decisiveness, as pointed out in The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida. However, when it is not balanced by the feminine, it can lead to violence and war, greed, and extreme individualism and competition.
How is the male to achieve this feminine-masculine balance?
- To start, learn to cultivate the “observer mind.” Most of us spend our life consumed by the constant chatter in our mind. However, as human beings, we have the ability to be self-reflective or aware of our own existence, which allows us to rise above the biological miracle of ourselves and recognize that we are at choice in how we live, feel, think and act.
- Then begin to practice the conscious use of sexual life force energy. Charles and Caroline Muir point out in Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving, “From the time a boy enters puberty… he’s pretty much controlled by sex.” When a man can learn to observe and channel his sexual life force energy into his heart, a transformation takes place. The Muir’s continue, “One of the greatest areas of misinformation concerns the purpose of sex, its goal. Most westerners, especially men, believe that the whole point of sex is ejaculation… For Tantricas, on the other hand, the purpose of sex is the conscious creation of harmony and physical well–being, the buildup of sexual energy, and the transcendence to spiritual levels of consciousness.”
- Open the heart. In Tantric Secrets for Men, Kerry and Diane Riley write, “One of the most powerful ways you can [awaken your beloved’s sexual energy] is through the heart, by opening more to intimacy. However, to be a real man you are not supposed to show too much intimacy.” Men have generally been socialized to suppress their feelings and not talk about them. The challenge for the 21st century male is to move beyond these societal beliefs and learn to connect emotionally with himself and others. True intimacy develops when sex no longer becomes about the end goal, but rather about the energy and connection shared during the act. Women especially need to feel a heart connection so that they can open up more fully sexually.
- Train your pelvic floor muscles. In Sacred Sexuality, Michael Mirdad refers to the term in-jaculation involving a “two-step process of separating the orgasm from the ejaculation and drawing the energy from this orgasm inwards and upwards along the spine.” This process begins by training the pelvic floor muscle regularly through squeezing and releasing coordinated the breath. Over time, a man can use his trained pelvic floor muscles during solo or partner love making to draw the aroused energy up into his heart center and beyond. This, of course, requires much practice and discipline and does not happen overnight. However, with proper training and guidance, a man can learn to master his ejaculatory impulse and enjoy extended pleasure and intimacy.
- Improve your health. In addition to experiencing greater bliss and prolonged pleasure the channeling of non-aroused and aroused energy for the male is highly beneficial for a man’s health. When a man ejaculates, he loses precious life force energy and feels depleted, perhaps falling asleep immediately afterwards. If he can learn to direct and circulate his sexual life force energy upwards into his heart and Third Eye, he can then re-direct this energy in all parts of his life, leading to more vitality, creativity, and aliveness in whatever he does. Physically, men who have made this practice part of their life report greater aliveness, increased energy at work, more focused workouts, and are able to maintain their sex drive later in life. Furthermore, this practice helps keep reproductive organs healthy and supports healing of conditions of ED including post-prostate surgery recovery.
If you are a man and reading this article consider avoiding the path towards the extinction of the male by 3014 by applying the above mindset and practices. If you are a woman, consider supporting the man in your life or your male friends and associates in learning the above practices. The benefits will be vast in all of our personal lives and for humanity at large!
To learn more in depth about the practices take a read at Sexual Enlightenment: How to Create Lasting Fulfillment in Life, Love and Intimacy by Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver.
