It’s said that the
feminine is rising. While having developed their 'masculine' capacities
over the past 50 years since the onset of the women’s movement, women
are re-connecting with their 'feminine' essence. However, women are
often still socialized to be ashamed of their sexuality. So what can a
woman do to fully balance her whole being? What is her role in the
planet’s conscious evolution of the sexual-spiritual integrated human?
Deborah
Sundahl points out in her book, Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot,
“Society considers it ‘not okay’ for women to be sexual in their own
right. Despite a national media that talks about every conceivable
aspect of sex, most American woman over the age of forty were raised
with the belief that ‘good girls are not sexual.’ Younger women, raised
with the influence of cable TV’s new explicitness… have taken the
notion of ‘bad girl’ and made a public display of it, yet still the
legacy of the good girl lingers, and it inhibits most women’s ability to
let go and enjoy.”
How can the 21st Century woman reclaim and
embrace her sexual self, discovering its extraordinary power, while
being integrated in her feminine and masculine nature. Here are some
tips to get started:
1. Become the witness to your beliefs
No
change can happen without awareness, so looking at your long held
beliefs is an important first step to reclaiming your sexuality. Begin
to witness the unconscious negative beliefs you hold, whether it be from
childhood, religion, media, or etc. Notice that many of these beliefs
were passed down generation to generation for millennia. You can choose
to create new, supportive beliefs about yourself, your body, and your
sexuality.
What separates us from the beasts is our ability to be
self-reflective or aware of our own existence, what we call “the
witness state of mind.” This uniquely human capacity allows us to rise
above the biological miracle of ourselves and recognize that we are at
choice in how we live, feel, and act, including our sexual beingness.
2. Embrace passion and desire
All
of us have a current of sexual life force energy – also referred to as
“chi” – running through our bodies at all times. In The Multi-Orgasmic
Woman, Mantak Chia & Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD explain:
“Desire
is a rich and potent part of our human experience… To be passionate is
to be full of chi. The English words ‘desire’ or ‘passion’ connote a
feeling of yearning and fervor that includes sex, but they also reflect
our strongest feelings about life. When we are passionate about
anything – our family, our work, our spirituality, an important social
cause – we are investing our chi in this experience. Our passion is
what moves us to action and ultimately is what gives us joy. We are
passionate about the things that matter most to us.”
To embrace
this energy is to embrace life itself. As we learn to honor our
sexuality, we also can draw on that sexual energy to enrich our lives as
a whole. By learning to embrace passion and desire, we can bring more
fulfillment and joy into our entire lives.
3. Know your “parts”
Many
women expect their partner to know how to please them without knowing
for themselves! Knowing yourself and your anatomy is an important step
towards embracing your sexuality.
Female sexual anatomy has been a
bit of a mystery throughout history, especially in terms of how women
experience pleasure and orgasm. For example, it is widely accepted that
the clitoris is an external organ only. In Eve’s Secrets, Josephine
Lowndes Sevely examines this history and reveals “…the female clitoris
has deeper structures under the skin. These deeper structures are the
organ’s two legs like parts that run along the lower part of the pubic
bones at either side of the lower vagina between the inner thighs.”
The
G-Spot is another area of the female body that is still the source of
some confusion. In Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot, Deborah Sundahl
explains, “The G-Spot is defined as both the prostate and a network of
erectile tissue similar to that found in a male penis.” She goes on to
say, “The G-spot, not the clitoris, is center stage as the area of a
woman’s genitals in which she can experience the greatest and most
diverse amount of erotic pleasure.”
In addition to the above
resources, experimenting with yourself to see what feels good is another
great way to get to know your “parts!”
4. Exercise your love muscle
The
pubococcygeus muscle, or the “PC” muscle, is the muscle group that
makes up and supports the pelvic floor of the body. Mantak Chia and
Maneewan Chia explain in Healing Love Through the Tao: Cultivating
Female Sexual Energy, “…With the exception of sexual intercourse, few
exercises strengthen the crucial pelvic muscles. Pelvic exercises do
exist which can increase CHI in these areas, thereby greatly
strengthening the reproductive organs and the complex network of tendons
surrounding them.”
In both men and women, the PC muscle
serves important functions in supporting the inner organs including
preventing incontinence, maintaining reproductive health, enhancing
pleasurable sexual experiences, and increasing aliveness for the woman.
Make
it a daily habit to exercise your love muscle and learn to coordinate
it with your inhale and exhale. If you’d like to be guided through this
practice get our Foundational Practices CD.
5. Transform desire into rocket fuel
Once
you’ve connected to and embraced your sexuality, learn to use this
energy to fuel all parts of your life. In The Multi-Orgasmic Woman,
Mantak Chia & Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD lay out many healing
techniques and meditation and breathing practices that can help draw
your precious energy up through your body instead of losing it through
menstruation or intercourse. These techniques include becoming aware of
the “Microcosmic Orbit” which is a “basic energetic pathway of the
body…. “When you circulate sexual energy through the Microcosmic Orbit,
you transform your desire into your energetic ‘rocket fuel’ and enhance
your vitality.”
Other techniques can be found in our book, Sexual Enlightenment.
These practices include an array of solo and partner exercises such as
Yin Yang: Balancing Feminine and Masculine Energy and Heart-to-Heart
connection: Partner Spooning.
This is an exciting time for women
to honor and hone their feminine essence and play an instrumental part
in shifting the planet’s evolution towards balancing the feminine and
masculine in all spheres of life.
Wednesday, May 6, 2015
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
Sexual Enlightenment - The Prologue
It
was the summer of 1969. Freddy, an African-American in his early teens, was
sprawled across the deck of the family houseboat in Sausalito, California, the
sun beating against his dark skin as he idly discussed the interwoven notions
of love, sex, and the sacred with family and friends. He was delighted as
somebody began playing the drums at a distance as he indulged in another warm
grape, smiling with pleasure. It was the Summer of Love, and he felt safe and
passionate.
Meanwhile,
across the world in Germany, a young woman sat nervously in a utilitarian
doctor’s office waiting for the gynecologist’s explanation of why her first
intercourse had been so excruciatingly painful. As a young child she had enjoyed
a sense of freedom in her body while often frolicking completely nude in the
hot, German summers with her nine siblings; that feeling of freedom changed
drastically when she entered puberty. Elsbeth had nobody to ask about why her
first act of intercourse had hurt so much. Conversations about sex beyond the
basics or how babies were made were not at all customary in her household. When
she was sixteen, her father had called her a whore for wearing makeup after she
returned one evening from a ballroom dance class with her first boyfriend.
The
gynecologist interrupted her thoughts with his determination that a small
medical procedure was needed to ease Elsbeth’s pain, and he completed it that
day in the office.
For
his part, eight-year-old Freddy’s life was changing as he went to live with his
dad and new white stepmom, while his three siblings stayed with his birth
mother after their parent’s separation. He always felt loved by his father, a
psychiatrist and student of Tantra, and was often surrounded by a supportive
and open-minded community of family friends.
One
day, Freddy, by now in his mid-teens, set on the home boat in a circle
comprised of a blend of Tantric-curious individuals who had attended his
father’s workshops, as well as friends, colleagues, and his father and
stepmother. When a silence briefly
passed over the group, Freddy took the opportunity to ask his Dad some
questions about things that had happened during his recent first sexual
experience. His father and some of the group members freely advised and
educated him without inhibitions.
Later
that day a package was sitting on the dining room table. “Son, I want you to
read this,” his father said warmly. Freddy unwrapped his first book about
sacred sexuality, and after graciously thanking his father, retreated to his
bedroom to read and learn more.
Back
in Germany, days after the gynecological procedure, Elsbeth’s boyfriend
announced his intention to leave the relationship. Heartbroken, she went home,
where she found her father sitting at the kitchen table, a letter in his hands,
his face livid.
“What
have you done?” he shouted, and she realized in that moment the letter was the
bill from the gynecologist. Her father now knew what she had been up to. After
being subjected to a harsh reprimand and lecture, Elsbeth retreated to her
bedroom feeling alone and dejected, as if the world had turned against her.
Thirty
years later Elsbeth, now a US citizen residing in Chicago, had developed into a
successful management consultant who traveled the world. One evening, while on
assignment for a multinational power company in Europe, she went back to her
corporate apartment and paused for a
moment, resting her head against the inside of the apartment door, keys still in the lock. She
shut her eyes and breathed deeply. This moment of reflection brought back the
deep despair she felt over a relationship with a married man she could not free
herself from. She scanned her apartment, heart heavy. She felt trapped in a
cycle of attraction to unavailable men and lacked hope of ever finding
fulfillment and sustaining love.
Confronted
with the futility of her love situation, she went to a Buddhist meditation
retreat at Plum Village in the south of France. Ten days in silent meditation
had her face her feelings, actions, and illusions. It was excruciating! Yet
those days helped her to connect with her spirit and turn around her life.
In
her soul searching, Elsbeth immersed herself in the study of the ancient
practice of Tantra that opened her up to her sexual-spiritual Self. Deep
healing and clearing allowed her to see her unconscious programming around love
and intimacy. She came to experience deeper trust in herself and see that she
no longer needed to look for love outside—she had discovered love within as a
state of being.
To
Freddy, Chicago was a new city bustling with possibilities and potential. He had
led a life of moving between corporate jobs and relationships with ease during
the previous two decades when living in San Francisco. His true passion lay in
creative pursuits, but fear of a loss of stability drove him to stay in
unfulfilling professional situations and pursue the performing arts only as a
hobby. Everything had been shaken up by this move to Chicago looking for
newness, diversion, and a new direction for his life. Faced with the opportunity
of creating anew, Freddy found room to breathe and to reconnect with his
creative self. He grinned, imagining again the standup comedian’s stage that
had once been so familiar to him from his early days in San Francisco and the
Djembe drumming that used to delight his spirit.
A
desire for deeper self-expression and authentically sharing his gift brought
resolve to bringing focus to his life. How to channel creativity and pleasure
became a pursuit inspired by his tantric practice and ongoing learning.
Then
he met a woman. He didn’t know much about her yet, just what her profile on a
tantric dating website had detailed and what small stories they had traded over
a week of e-mail contact. Standing on her doorstep, he composed himself,
feeling good about meeting this woman he wanted to know more about.
She
had learned from his profile that he had grown up in a tantric household, an
interesting life detail that immediately had caught her attention and
curiosity. Smoothing her hands over her dress once more, she felt a flutter of
pleasant anticipation when the doorbell rang.
As
Freddy looked up the steps and Elsbeth looked back at him, they sensed that
this encounter had the potential for a new future for the two of them. That
night they shared wine and food, laughter and conversation, hopes and
aspirations, and tantric connection. Indeed this budding relationship was born
of a desire to create love versus unconsciously falling into it and bringing
forth a higher purpose together beyond playing out the romantic drama.
This
was the beginning of discovering joint purpose and direction in their personal
and professional lives. A few months into the relationship, they birthed TantraNova,
their transformational company. Integrating sex, love, and consciousness had
opened a door to wholeness within each of them and in their relationship. They
have come to coin this evolved state of being sexual enlightenment. How to share this opportunity to heal,
transform, and consciously create fulfillment in life and relationships became
their inquiry and mission for years to come.
After
leading hundreds of workshops and assisting thousands of couples and singles
since that first auspicious rendezvous, Elsbeth and Freddy are sharing with you
in this book how you can also enter the world of sexual enlightenment and
travel the road of creative joy and sexual, emotional, and spiritual wholeness.
Enjoy the journey!
Here you can learn more about sexual enlightenment!
Friday, April 4, 2014
The Extinction of the Male! Really?
In a recent conversation a scientist friend of ours mentioned that researchers have indicated the extinction of the male within a thousand years or so. This had our heads churning. What would need to change in order to divert the reality of such a prognosis? Here is what we came up with:
For centuries masculine energy has been dominating the planet as feminine energy has been suppressed. Modern men are heralded for their sexual prowess and conquests from an early age; when a teenage boy experiences sex for the first time, he may tell his father, who will reaffirm the boy’s virility by congratulating him and giving him condoms—a tacit approval of what he’s done and an implication that the boy is on his path to manhood.
On the other hand, when a teenage girl has sex for the first time, often she will keep it secret out of shame or embarrassment. She most likely will not go to her mother for fear of disapproval and being considered impure or no longer marriage material. In some parts of the world, she may be called a whore, outcast from her family or community, or even stoned to death.
Masculine and feminine energy—like testosterone and estrogen—exists in all people, regardless of gender, and the balance between the two is what leads to harmony amongst each other and throughout the world.
A shift of consciousness is happening now as the feminine is rising. Women are re-connecting with their feminine essence while having developed their masculine capacities over the past 50 years since the onset of the women’s movement.
The call for the 21st century male is to come into balance of his masculine or yang side with his feminine or yin side. Masculine essence has many gifts to offer, such as clarity and decisiveness, as pointed out in The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida. However, when it is not balanced by the feminine, it can lead to violence and war, greed, and extreme individualism and competition.
How is the male to achieve this feminine-masculine balance?
If you are a man and reading this article consider avoiding the path towards the extinction of the male by 3014 by applying the above mindset and practices. If you are a woman, consider supporting the man in your life or your male friends and associates in learning the above practices. The benefits will be vast in all of our personal lives and for humanity at large!
To learn more in depth about the practices take a read at Sexual Enlightenment: How to Create Lasting Fulfillment in Life, Love and Intimacy by Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver.
For centuries masculine energy has been dominating the planet as feminine energy has been suppressed. Modern men are heralded for their sexual prowess and conquests from an early age; when a teenage boy experiences sex for the first time, he may tell his father, who will reaffirm the boy’s virility by congratulating him and giving him condoms—a tacit approval of what he’s done and an implication that the boy is on his path to manhood.
On the other hand, when a teenage girl has sex for the first time, often she will keep it secret out of shame or embarrassment. She most likely will not go to her mother for fear of disapproval and being considered impure or no longer marriage material. In some parts of the world, she may be called a whore, outcast from her family or community, or even stoned to death.
Masculine and feminine energy—like testosterone and estrogen—exists in all people, regardless of gender, and the balance between the two is what leads to harmony amongst each other and throughout the world.
A shift of consciousness is happening now as the feminine is rising. Women are re-connecting with their feminine essence while having developed their masculine capacities over the past 50 years since the onset of the women’s movement.
The call for the 21st century male is to come into balance of his masculine or yang side with his feminine or yin side. Masculine essence has many gifts to offer, such as clarity and decisiveness, as pointed out in The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida. However, when it is not balanced by the feminine, it can lead to violence and war, greed, and extreme individualism and competition.
How is the male to achieve this feminine-masculine balance?
- To start, learn to cultivate the “observer mind.” Most of us spend our life consumed by the constant chatter in our mind. However, as human beings, we have the ability to be self-reflective or aware of our own existence, which allows us to rise above the biological miracle of ourselves and recognize that we are at choice in how we live, feel, think and act.
- Then begin to practice the conscious use of sexual life force energy. Charles and Caroline Muir point out in Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving, “From the time a boy enters puberty… he’s pretty much controlled by sex.” When a man can learn to observe and channel his sexual life force energy into his heart, a transformation takes place. The Muir’s continue, “One of the greatest areas of misinformation concerns the purpose of sex, its goal. Most westerners, especially men, believe that the whole point of sex is ejaculation… For Tantricas, on the other hand, the purpose of sex is the conscious creation of harmony and physical well–being, the buildup of sexual energy, and the transcendence to spiritual levels of consciousness.”
- Open the heart. In Tantric Secrets for Men, Kerry and Diane Riley write, “One of the most powerful ways you can [awaken your beloved’s sexual energy] is through the heart, by opening more to intimacy. However, to be a real man you are not supposed to show too much intimacy.” Men have generally been socialized to suppress their feelings and not talk about them. The challenge for the 21st century male is to move beyond these societal beliefs and learn to connect emotionally with himself and others. True intimacy develops when sex no longer becomes about the end goal, but rather about the energy and connection shared during the act. Women especially need to feel a heart connection so that they can open up more fully sexually.
- Train your pelvic floor muscles. In Sacred Sexuality, Michael Mirdad refers to the term in-jaculation involving a “two-step process of separating the orgasm from the ejaculation and drawing the energy from this orgasm inwards and upwards along the spine.” This process begins by training the pelvic floor muscle regularly through squeezing and releasing coordinated the breath. Over time, a man can use his trained pelvic floor muscles during solo or partner love making to draw the aroused energy up into his heart center and beyond. This, of course, requires much practice and discipline and does not happen overnight. However, with proper training and guidance, a man can learn to master his ejaculatory impulse and enjoy extended pleasure and intimacy.
- Improve your health. In addition to experiencing greater bliss and prolonged pleasure the channeling of non-aroused and aroused energy for the male is highly beneficial for a man’s health. When a man ejaculates, he loses precious life force energy and feels depleted, perhaps falling asleep immediately afterwards. If he can learn to direct and circulate his sexual life force energy upwards into his heart and Third Eye, he can then re-direct this energy in all parts of his life, leading to more vitality, creativity, and aliveness in whatever he does. Physically, men who have made this practice part of their life report greater aliveness, increased energy at work, more focused workouts, and are able to maintain their sex drive later in life. Furthermore, this practice helps keep reproductive organs healthy and supports healing of conditions of ED including post-prostate surgery recovery.
If you are a man and reading this article consider avoiding the path towards the extinction of the male by 3014 by applying the above mindset and practices. If you are a woman, consider supporting the man in your life or your male friends and associates in learning the above practices. The benefits will be vast in all of our personal lives and for humanity at large!
To learn more in depth about the practices take a read at Sexual Enlightenment: How to Create Lasting Fulfillment in Life, Love and Intimacy by Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver.
Friday, March 14, 2014
TantraNova Program Schedule: March-June 2014
MARCH
TANTRIC MASSAGE WORKSHOP March 23
SONG SOIREE – Loving Your
Life March 28
MASTERY AND CERTIFICATION: Program
Intensive March 29-April 4
APRIL
UNITY NORTHSHORE: CREATING INTIMACY AND
LOVE April 5
TANTRIC MASSAGE WORKSHOP April 6
INTRODUCTORY WORKSHOP April 9
WORKSHOP FOR WOMEN Explore the Power of the
Divine Feminine Level II April 12/13
ADVANCED TANTRIC MASSAGE CLASS April19
CREATING INTIMACY AND LOVE: Beginner
Seminar April 26
BODHI SPIRITUAL CENTER: Conversation with
the Reverend April 27 and Workshop
MAY
INTRODUCTORY WORKSHOP May 1
TANTRIC MASSAGE WORKSHOPMay 4
FULFILLMENT, VITALITY & PLEASURE -
FOR COUPLES & SINGLES: Sustaining Masculine Energy and Pleasure
May 16-18
WORKSHOP FOR MEN: The Power of Compassion
in the Masculine May 31
JUNE
TANTRIC MASSAGE WORKSHOP June 1
INTRODUCTORY WORKSHOP June 3
COUPLES RETREAT AT ESALEN, Big Sur,
CA June 8-13
WORKSHOP FOR WOMEN Explore the Power of the
Divine Feminine Level I June 21/22
CREATING INTIMACY AND LOVE: Beginner
Seminar May 28
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Monday, February 24, 2014
TantraNova Workshops, Retreats and Events: March-June 2014
MARCH
TANTRIC
MASSAGE WORKSHOP March 23
SONG SOIREE – Loving Your Life March 28
MASTERY AND CERTIFICATION: Program Intensive March 29-April 4
APRIL
UNITY
NORTHSHORE: CREATING INTIMACY AND LOVE April 5
TANTRIC
MASSAGE WORKSHOP April 6
INTRODUCTORY
WORKSHOP April 9
WORKSHOP
FOR WOMEN Explore the Power of the Divine Feminine Level II April
12/13
ADVANCED
TANTRIC MASSAGE CLASS April19
CREATING
INTIMACY AND LOVE: Beginner Seminar April 26
BODHI
SPIRITUAL CENTER: Conversation with the Reverend April 27 and Workshop
MAY
INTRODUCTORY
WORKSHOP May 1
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-programs/intimacy-workshop-introductions.html
TANTRIC
MASSAGE WORKSHOPMay 4
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-programs/tantric-massage-workshops.html
FULFILLMENT,
VITALITY & PLEASURE - FOR COUPLES & SINGLES: Sustaining
Masculine Energy and Pleasure May 16-18
WORKSHOP
FOR MEN: The Power of Compassion in the Masculine May 31
JUNE
TANTRIC
MASSAGE WORKSHOP June 1
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-programs/tantric-massage-workshops.html
INTRODUCTORY
WORKSHOP June 3
COUPLES
RETREAT AT ESALEN, Big Sur, CA June 8-13
WORKSHOP
FOR WOMEN Explore the Power of the Divine Feminine Level I June
21/22
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-programs/workshops-for-women.html
CREATING
INTIMACY AND LOVE: Beginner Seminar May 28
Monday, February 3, 2014
How to Face the Arctic Vortex ....
Sub-zero temperature and arctic vortexes have kept us indoors here in Chicago. Though we habe been fueling our hearts with love energy and imbuing our consciousness with creating new opportunities.
Voila, we now have a book trailer and website to invite you further into the world of Sexual Enlightenment.
A radio book tour has us engaged during the months of January and February in over forty radio shows reaching audiences across the country and around the world. What an opportunity to share the message of Sexual Enlightenment. For your listening enjoyment, here is one episode recorded on the ‘Angels in the Buff’ radio show with host Stephanie Lodge.
We are also so excited to share with you a great book review that we received from Kirkus Review, an industry leader. Take a look at it if you’d like to hear a view from a third party that is known in publishing circles to be notoriously tough.
Looking ahead we want to invite you to join us at one of our retreats in exotic and inspiring parts of the world: Hawaiian Island Cruise in May, Esalen in June and Kripalu for New Years.
All our Chicago workshops, private programs and events are listed on the TantraNova blog page. Browse the offerings, contact us with any questions and join us at one of the opportunities!
Here is to your Enlightenment! Dr. E and Freddy Z www.TantraNova.com
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