The Dance of Feminine & Masculine

Last weekend was the Air & Water Show in Chicago. It's Elsbeth speaking: On my walk by Lake Michigan last Sunday I arrived just in time for getting a "front row seat" near Belmont Harbor to watch the acrobatic and exhilarating configurations the Blue Angels were performing.

Focused and channeled energy – in terms of the engineering capacity of the jet planes as well as the pilots who fly them! Masculine energy at its best! Flow and attuned coordination – in terms of flying together superbly as a team! Feminine energy at its best!

I am always in awe when watching this Air Force team. I am reminded of the beauty of the integration and dance of the feminine and masculine, the Yin and the Yang, both within oneself as well as between people.

When I find myself befallen by anger, blame, disappointment, feeling sorry for myself, etc., I remember to return myself to coming into balance of the feminine and masculine by ruminating on the polarities of Yin and Yang such as:

Soft / Strong
Creative / Intentional
Receiving / Giving
Playful / Grounded
Listening / Speaking
Circular / Linear
Sensitive and intuitive / Self-disciplined
ETC.

This brings me back to my peaceful, centered and joyous Self. Go try this practice. It will work for you as well!!!

Enjoy the ruminating!
 

P.S. Freddy Zental sends his greetings from his motor cycle freedom ride in Wisconsin this weekend. 
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UPCOMING TantraNova WORKSHOPS & PROGRAMS

PRIVATE PROGRAMS AND RETREATS
For Couples
For Singles

Be Optimal: INTRODUCTORY WORKSHOP
August 20 7:00-9:00pm     Glenview, IL  
http://beoptimal.com/secrets-to-lasting-intimacy/   
 
INTRODUCTORY WORKSHOPS at TantraNova
Introductory Workshops September 6 / October 2 / November 7  
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/intimacy-workshop-introductions.html

CREATING INTIMACY & LOVE: Beginner Level For Couples & Singles
August 25 / October 20
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/intimacy-workshops-beginner.html

TANTRIC MASSAGE WORKSHOP
August 26 / September 29
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/tantric-massage-workshops.html

WORKSHOP FOR MEN
THE POWER OF COMPASSION IN THE MASCULINE
September 15
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/workshops-for-men.html

CREATION YOGA CLASS with Michelle Fiore
September 20 7-8:30pm
A fusion of traditional posture practice (asana) with elements of Hatha and Tantric Yoga. Please call 773-525-5006 to register.

SEXUAL ENLIGHTENMENT - A One-Man Show
September 30  8-9:30pm with reception following the performance
http://www.tantranova.com/tantranova-theatre.html

WORKSHOP RETREATS FOR COUPLES & SINGLES: Beginner/Intermediate
FULFILLMENT, VITALITY & PLEASURE: Sustaining Masculine Energy & Pleasure
September 21-23   
SECRETS TO LASTING INTIMACY: Re-awakening Feminine Energ y & Joy   
November 2-4
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/intimacy-workshops-beginner-intermediate.html

WORKSHOPS FOR WOMEN
Feminine Essence: Explore the Power of the Divine Feminine
Level I   October 6/7
Level II  December 1/2
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/workshops-for-women.html

THEATRE WORKSHOP: BREAKTHROUGH TO YOUR FULL SELF-EXPRESSION
January 12, 2013
http://www.tantranova.com/intimacy-tantra-programs/breakthrough-workshop.html

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TantraNova at the WEST COAST of the United States
TANTRANOVA AT ESALEN, BIG SUR, CALIFORNIA
November 11-16
February 10-15
http://webapp.esalen.org/workshops/11450

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TantraNova at the EAST COAST of the United States
TANTRANOVA AT KRIPALU, Western Massachusetts
New Year's Eve - Workshop and Ecstatic Puja
December 30-January 1
http://kripalu.org/program/view/TYRP-121/tantra_yoga_new_years_retreat_and_puja_experience

Motorcycling Pleasure

To this day, I remember my very first motorcycle: I was 9 years old and my father had a friend who was selling a Honda 90cc. I wanted it so bad. My father said he would get it for me if I would only ride in the backyard.  I knew how to ride a bicycle but a motorcycle was a whole new kettle of fish.  Shifting, throttling and the weight were something new. So I asked my stepmother to help me learn.  Before long I was riding like it was an extension of my right hand.  I had motorcycles off and on through the end of high school. After that I did not ride a motorcycle for 20 years.

Fast-forward to a month ago, I got a brand-new Harley Davidson Road King classic 2012. Wow!!  I always loved motorcycle riding and now I could ride a Harley-Davidson whenever I wanted – of course the weather permitting given that I live in Chicago!!! With the Harley I was definitely taking it up a notch.  It is a beautiful bike. It seems to me everyone who I introduce my bike to gets this inspired look in their eyes.  I totally get it… when riding my motorcycle I am reconnected and present in the moment: the experience of leaning into a curve, the wind in my face, and the road ahead.  It feels like a meditation of sorts, a total sense of freedom!   Sometimes at stoplights, I find myself talking to people in cars with the windows down. Rarely an opportunity I would have driving in my car.   

In short, when riding my motorcycle I feel free, inspired and present in the now. And many who see me riding are reminded of a sense of inspiration and joy … hallelujah!  Metaphorically speaking, I’d say find YOUR motorcycle – whatever that may be for you – and ride it!!

How to Use Your Jade Yoni Egg!

How to use your Jade Yoni Egg for pelvic floor and vaginal strengthening: In Sanskrit, Yoni means "Sacred Space" which stands for a woman's sexual center.

Prepare:
Thread a non-waxed and non-favored dental floss (Glide works best) through the drilled hole at the thinner end of the egg. This will allow for greater ease when removing your Jade Yoni Egg.

Insert:
If your Egg is threaded, lead with the bottom or wider end of the Egg when inserting it into the Yoni. If your egg is non-threaded, lead with the top or thinner end of the Egg into the Yoni. A drop of lubrication may ease the entering, however do not use too much lube, so you prevent the Egg from sliding out.
You may squat or sit on the toilet and insert the Egg until it's all the way in the vagina. The Egg can't get lost. The vagina or Yoni is only about 3-4 inches deep and is closed at the other end except for the tiny opening in the cervix that goes into the uterus. There is nowhere for the egg to go. 

Remove:
When you are ready to remove your Egg squat or sit on the toilet: If your egg is threaded, pull on the thread while gently pushing the egg out into your hand. If your egg is non-threaded, push the egg out as you would do during a bowl movement. Place one hand underneath the Yoni opening to safely catch the egg.

Care:
Wash the Egg with warm water and mild soap and dry it off with a soft cloth. Please don't boil it, it will crack. Mild soap and water are enough. Be careful not to drop it. Keep it in its bag when not in use.

Practice:
Use the Jade Yoni Egg anytime you are doing your pelvic floor exercises; leave it in while you walk around your home. When you can keep it in without losing it, you are free to have it inside of you all day long.

Benefits:

• Feel more grounded and centered in yourself
• Get stronger and toned pelvic floor muscles
• Be more in tune with your sensuous capacity
• Massage your Yoni from the inside
• Increase your flow of sexual hormones
• Develop stronger orgasms
• Heighten the responsiveness of your G-Spot
• Maintain healthy reproductive organs
• Prevent incontinence in later years

To support your pelvic floor muscle and Yoni practice consider getting TantraNova's Foundational Practice CD that will guide you in doing the PC (pelvic floor) muscle exercise.

For further information contact: +1-773-525-5006

www.TantraNova.com

What About Your Sexual Intelligence Quotient?

We all know about IQ, emotional intelligence, kinesthetic intelligence, and so forth. But what do we know about sexual intelligence? The term isn't well-known, nor is it something that has been developed traditionally.

Sexual intelligence can be distinguished by two dimensions:

The first involves sexual energy that brings forth life in all that is alive -- animals, human beings, and plants. This intelligence was around long before we became aware of ourselves, long before we knew about E=mc2. It's a built-in intelligence present in sexual energy, given by nature, God, or the eternal consciousness. Sexual energy is the spark of this divine intelligence that created us.

The second dimension of sexual intelligence involves the human capacity to be self-reflective or aware of one's own existence, and particularly of one's life force energy that is sexual in nature. In contrast to animals, which can only follow their procreative wiring when in heat, human beings have the potential to bring awareness and consciousness to their sexual selves -- their feelings, thoughts, sensations, and behaviors -- which can create the opportunity to be at choice regarding the use of their life force or sexual energy.

Therefore, as reflective humans, we can develop the capacity to bring awareness to the spark of life within us and use this not only in sexual acts, but to create our whole lives. Our inquiry focuses on sexual intelligence that entails the systemic relationship of creativity and pleasure built into life force or sexual energy that can be found everywhere in life. We are particularly interested in bringing light to that systemic relationship inherent in the manifestation of sexual energy for the sake of consciously and joyously creating our lives, relationships, and careers.

Sexual Energy

As we learned in our physics and chemistry classes in school, energy can take many forms:

• Electrical energy lights up the sky during thunderstorms and illuminates our homes at night.
• Kinetic energy sends a ball flying through the air when we hit it with a bat.
• Chemical energy drives our bodies' systems and keeps us moving physically.
• Thermal energy can heat our houses and the food we eat.

However, absent from high school and college curricula is human energy as it manifests in our bodies and consciousness. Human life force energy is sexual in nature (though we are not talking here about traditional sex education) and encompasses a range of states from subtle to intensely aroused. We become aware of this energy when it shows up in procreation, when we are having sex, but it can also be much vaster than and just as potent as what we experience during sex. It can be used to create whatever we want to bring into our lives such as good health, well-being, fulfilling relationships, endeavors, and/or careers. 

The sex act is one way of experiencing and using sexual energy, but not the only way; intercourse is one stage on the continuum of experiencing sexual energy. Without sexual energy to spark our desires, none of us would be here. It is fundamental not just to human existence but to all of life as we know it and has been present since the very dawn of creation.

Though we cannot see it, life force or sexual energy is ever-present, both when we are aroused in the bedroom and when we are at rest and sex is the furthest thing from our minds -- and during every state in between. It's there when we're doing mundane tasks like cooking dinner or getting dressed in the morning.

Sexual energy in its physical manifestation and experience is unique in that it's creative and pleasurable. This allows for the continuing existence of life, which is part of us by nature. We can learn to draw on this awareness of creativity and pleasure, similar to when we're in a loving space or viewing a work of art or anything in which we regularly find joy. Our contention is that when life force or sexual energy is unencumbered and free of past personal stories and collective interpretations that no longer serve us, creativity and pleasure are more accessible to us everywhere in life: where we live, in the people we surround ourselves with, in the work we do. When we learn sexual consciousness practices, creativity and pleasure start showing up as a default way of being in the simple process of living.

Becoming the Observer

Sexual intelligence begins when we bring intention and focused attention to our life force or sexual energy. Unlike animals that work simply on biological imperatives to keep their kind from becoming extinct, we have the ability to become the observer of our desires, impulses, wants, fears, and joys. Of course we're wired in that biological dimension as well; in the big picture we're animals ourselves, and it's our inherent mission to continue to thrive generation after generation. In this dimension of sexual energy, we are machines -- it doesn't require consciousness on our part. It's automatic and just happens whether we're aware of it or not.

What separates us from the beasts, then, is the second dimension of bringing consciousness to sexual energy -- our ability to be self-reflective or aware of our own existence, what we call the observer of the self. This uniquely human capacity allows us to rise above the biological miracle we have been put here to perform and recognize that we are at choice in how we live, feel, and act, including our sexual beingness.

Being at choice means we are able to see what is versus what we think should be. This allows us to become clear about what we truly want and take effective action toward fulfilling it. When we are aware of being at choice regarding our sexual beings we can tap into and use our sexual energy in a multitude of ways depending on what we want to create in our lives and relationships. We can use it in the sex act. We can connect with our sacredness and deepen the intimate connection with our beloved. We can integrate our sexual, emotional, and spiritual being. We can use it to fuel our work creatively or connect consciously with the people around us.

Developing this state of mind is essential to working with sexual energy, to tapping in to it and utilizing it to create fulfilling lives for ourselves. Without the observer mind, we can be doomed to an eternity of automatic and habitual behaviors that often produce suffering and a sense of being victimized by life. In other words, we live devoid of creativity and pleasure.

As a good example of the observer, let's look at a moose walking through a forest, just going along its merry way. Then, suddenly, a big tree falls right in front of her. The moose looks at the tree, lifts her nose to smell it, then nibbles on the tree's twigs and leaves. As she eats, rain starts to fall. The moose raises her head, enjoying and tasting the drops that fall on her face. When she's had her fill she simply finds her way around the fallen tree and continues on her journey.

Now say a human is walking through the forest when suddenly a big tree falls right in front of him. He'll look angrily at the tree, cursing and huffing: "Now I'm going to be late for my meeting. And what about my wife and children and my retirement fund? I have to make a bridge to get where I need to go! What? It's raining too?" Throwing his hands up in despair and disgust, he'll exclaim, "Why me, God? Why me?"

Becoming like the moose allows us to be in the present moment, witness what is, notice how we feel, and watch the chatter, thoughts, and interpretations in our minds. As humans we are programmed to dwell on the drama that's already passed instead of focusing on the present. Instead of getting caught up in this chatter of our minds, we can cultivate our capacity to be like the moose -- simply to be with what is happening right here and now. In this witness or observer state we are connected with ourselves and tap in to stillness and peace -- and that's the space where we can become sexually intelligent.

In our next blog post we will discuss how to get "sexually intelligent."

Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver are the authors of the forthcoming book "Sexual Intelligence: The Rosetta Stone of the Twenty-First Century". For more information go to their website at TantraNova.